Hetalialight
by Smalls2233
Summary: When Iggy-la moves to Spoons, he meets France-ward who has a very strange aura surrounding him. This makes fun of Twilight. Fail summary is fail. FrUK
1. Chapter 1

**If you like Twilight please just like stop reading right here...This story is meant to make fun of Twilight so yeah. I don't own Twilight (thank France) or Hetalia (I wish I did) so enjoy, more chapters shall come as I make them. I hope you guys like this xD**

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I was moving to a town called Spoons to live with my father, Sealand-ie. Even though it was my choice to move there, I couldn't stop whining about it.

"Iggy-la," my mother, Latvia-ee started "you do know that you don't have to go, right?"

"I know mum, but I have to go as I don't particuarly want to make you and _him_ keep having to take care of me." I said.

My mother gave me a quick hug and I left to get on my plane and away from rainy old England. Of course when I got out of the plane, and hoping for some sunshine, I got rain. "Bloody hell," I said "where the hell is the sun, and where is Sealand-ie, that wanker?"

"IGGY-LA~ YOU'VE GROWN!" My father Sealand-ie yelled hugging me, and my worst nightmare had come true, he was the town sherif, people were recognizing him.

"Bloody hell put me down Seala-I mean dad," I sputtered, forgetting that I could only call him Sealand-ie around my mum. Or in my thoughts which were more often than not, very whiny.

"But Iggy-la, I thought you loved hugs? Or did you change and become more tsundere since I've last seen you?" Sealand-ie asked.

"I'm not a tsundere, I've just never liked hugs!" I said, denying the fact that I was completely unlikeable.

"Oh, well lets drive back to the house in an awkward silence." Sealand-ie said getting into his police car.

When I reached the house I saw the most atrocious piece of machinery to ever exist sitting in the front yard, some rust stained old pickup truck that was so obviously american made I wanted to hurl. "Er dad, what is this...Thing in the yard?" I asked.

"Well, Canada-y stopped by and dropped that off for you to drive. Don't you just love it? I do, it reminds me of where I was born, it's rusty, it's from the 40s, and nobody really likes it except for me." Sealand-ie said.

"Er, who's Canada-y?" I asked

"You don't remember Canada-y? He pracically raised you!" Sealand-ie exclaimed.

"Er no not at all, whatever I'm gonna go mope in my room a bit," I said.

The first thing I noticed about my room was it looked like the interior of a ship, actually the whole house looked like that, my father for some reason really likes ships. When I went into the single bathroom in the house I just stared at my reflection in the mirror wondering whether or not I should trim my bushy eyebrows for school the next day. I decided not to and went to my room to cry.

The next morning I woke up and made myself a breakfast of scones trying not to be too early for school. After I finished my scones I went upstairs to get dressed and then leave in my piece of junk truck to get to school.

When I got to the World Academy W the first thing I noticed was that it was extremely fancy, and everyone had better cars than me and so I decided to murder my father when I got home that day. Upon entering the school I noticed that every male in the school was staring at me, and by every male in the school that probably about 99% of the student body. I didn't understand why everyone was staring at me, after all I was pretty unlikeable and there was pretty much a cloud of look at me and die hanging above my head. Yet people still wanted to stare at me, and drown in a pile of drool.

"Hey! Are you new here? Can I claim your breasts to be mine?" asked a man who looked to be South Korean.

"I do happen to be new here, and I do not have breasts! I have pecs! By the way what is your name?" I stammered.

"I'm Korea-ic, and did you know that those shoes you're wearing originated in me? Oh the school newspaper also originated in me. The teachers originated in me, and so did education." Korea-ic said jumping up and down excitedly.

"O...kay then." I said walking faster.

By lunch I managed to make two more friends, Russia-ke and China-ca, so I sat with them at lunch. But there was a group of people who had caught my eye. "Who are they?" I asked

"They're the Mullens, none of them are biologically related, so most of them are going out with each other. Italy-ice and Germany-er are dating, Finland-lie and Sweden-et are dating, and France-ward is all alone, of course he's gone out with every male in this school, even me. Though I don't want to talk about that, I had to get an abortion." China-ca said.

I realy wanted to point out the fact that they were both male, and thus it was impossible for China-ca to get pregnet but that doesn't seem like something that he would take lightly, so I just stared at France-ward's beautiful blue eyes. His hair was long and blonde, and he even had a slight beard. But when he turned his head to look at me I turned away quickly, waiting for the lunch bell to ring.

When it came time for biology I practically ran to the room so I wouldn't be late and the teacher told me to sit in the only open seat, right next to France-ward Mullen.

"H-hi, France-ward, I'm Iggy-la Herring, it's nice to meet you," I said polietly as I was a gentleman after all.

"Bonjour, mon cher, it's a pleasure to meet you. Non?" France-ward said to me, his hand reaching down to grope my ass.

After the ass gropeing incident I tried to move my seat farther away from him, and ran out crying that my inocence was ruined, and I was crying all the way home.


	2. Chapter 2

The next day was better, well except for the fact that France-ward wasn't there. I was spending the whole day dreading seeing him because of the ass gropeing incident. But for some reason I was disappointed that he wasn't there, his electric blue eyes were so entrancing. Of course when I was daydreaming I tripped over my feet and went falling, but I was caught by Russia-ke, who for some reason, was following me around.

"Thanks, Russia-ke," I said wairly, there was just something about him that scared me.

"No problem, Iggy-la, but will you become one with Russia now?" Russia-ke asked me, for the hundredth time that day.

"I er um no," I said rushing off to the cafeteria, tripping several times along the way.

When the day had finished China-ca and I went shopping in some little town and enjoyed ourselves. When I got home Sealand-ie was just getting home from work hanging up his boots and gun, so I as per usual ignored him and went upstairs to read _The Chronicals of Narnia: The Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe_ and do my maths homework, wishing that my unicorn friends could wisk me away and I could be a king of Narnia.

The rest of the week was uneventful; France-ward Mullen and his family wasn't there, Russia-ke kept asking me to become one with him, and China-ca and I went shopping a lot, it turns out that he and Korea-ic were brothers but Korea-ic was adopted from South Korea and he was from China.

On Monday, I still didn't see France-ward so I fell into step beside Russia-ke who again asked me to become one which by that time I had learned to ignore and change the subject. When I got into the school I made my way to English class and we had a pop-quiz on some piece of literacy called _Twilight_ now of course, I had never read that as my friend the Flying Mint Bunny had previously read it and said it was the most horrid piece of paper to be ever called a book so, the book was acting as kindling in my fire, but somehow I answered the questions right.

When I was leaving the main buliding of the school to get to the lunchroom there were little puff-balls floating from the sky.

"Kol kol kol kol, General Winter needs to leave me alone," Russia-ke said evily, pulling out a pipe, "This damned snow needs to leave so the sunflowers can grow."

"Snow? What? I hate snow, I hate rain, I hate sunshine. Why does Spoons do this to me?" I cried. I mumbled to myself as I was walking the rest of the way to the lunchroom, but when I got there I saw the most marvelous sight the world has ever graced me with. France-ward Mullen was sitting at his normal table, groping the ass of anyone who walked by.

"Uh, Iggy-la, you're staring at France-ward again," Korea-ic said preparing to do his normal breast grope, I still do not understand why everyone at the school had some interest in gropeing everything that moves.

"Oh, uh, well, sorry..." I mumbled still staring through my thick eyebrows at France-ward Mullen.

Biology pulled around again and I was freaking out at the prospect at sitting next to France-ward again, after all what would he do to me this time? Rape me? But I pulled those thoughts from my mind as soon as I saw his gorgous face.

"Bonjour, Iggy-la. I'm sorry about the uh _incident_ last time, I hope you didn't take offence to it," France-ward said, every bit the gentleman he looked to be.

"Oh, uh, hey, and I didn't take offence to it" I said flustered. How did this man have this effect on me?

Our teacher announced that we had to work in pairs for a project to figure out what type of root some samples on the slides were. Of course I had already done this lab before, but I was a gentleman of course and let France-ward do work too.

"Would you like to go first, Iggy-la?" He asked, and at that moment I could've died and been happy, I mean _France-ward Mullen_ the hottest male in the school (which was saying something) was being a gentleman. So I didn't turn him down and with both of our wits about us we were working hard when we started chatting.

"So," France-ward began, "Why did you move here?"

"It's complicated, I mean my mum Latvia-ee got remarried to some guy and I just didn't want to be a third-wheel. So I moved here, I mean I was also hoping for some sun since I used to live in England, but it seems to be even more rainy." I said

"Well, right now it's not raining, but it's snowing! Isn't that wonderful, mon cher?" France-ward exclaimed.

"I hate snow though, really I hate any weather but that's just me," I said grumpily.

When we finished I said goodbye to France-ward who tried to give me a good-bye hug, but I pulled away from him when that happened, because after all, I was a tsundere in denial. But we had finished first so I was quite happy. But then Russia-ke came up to us, and was again asking me to become one with him, but he did pick up my books for me.

With the snow falling daintily from the sky, I drove home from school hoping that tomorrow, I would see France-ward again.


	3. Chapters Three and Four

The first thing I noticed the next morning was the sparkling light that was thrown across my room. It had snowed overnight and the ground was covered in the sparkling crystals.

"Shit," I said because of my hatred of pretty much everything.

Mumbling curses at the world I managed to get to my car only slipping about ten times on the way. But of course when I got to school the ground was even worse off as apparently the school had never heard of putting salt on the parking lot to clear it off. But in the middle of my internal complaining there was a loud screech and a large car was hurdling towards me. I closed my eyes preparing for immanent death, but I didn't feel anything so I opened my eyes and in front of me, preparing to molest me was France-ward Mullen.

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?" I screamed.

"What does it look like? I'm rescuing you." France-ward replied casually.

"It looks like you were about to rape me, and get your hand away from my arse." I said nearly screaming, restraining myself from choking him, or worse cursing him.

"Alright, I'll move my hands, but great way of thanking the person who saved your life." France-ward said glaring at me.

"Wait, how did you get over here anyway? I was looking at you and you were all the way across the car park." I said.

"What? No, I was right beside you, Iggy-la I think you may have had some head trauma. Oh look there's the ambulance, here let me help you up." France-ward said, taking my hand.

I nearly died when they insisted on taking me down to the ER, with a neck brace on. I kept insisting that I was fine, and I didn't need the help, but France-ward had convinced him, and he was sitting there smirking at me when they put me on a gurney. Inside the ER the most beautiful man I had ever seen, besides France-ward came in and introduced himself as Spain-le Mullen, France-ward's father.

"Hola," Spain-le said cheerfully "So you were in a car crash? How is your head feeling? Your vitals seem to be muy bueno I bet you're happy France-ward was there to help you."

"Wait what? Help? HE WAS ABOUT TO RAPE ME AND YOU CALL THAT HELPING?" I screamed veins bulging in my neck.

"Sí, that was helping, es ayuda muy bueno. Your face is so cute by the way, just like a little tomato!" Spain-le said cheerfully while helping me out of bed, "have fun and try to not get in anymore car crashes!" He told me as got me a wheelchair and wheeled me out to the lobby where France-ward was waiting.

"Bonjour papa, I see you met Iggy-la." France-ward said in acknowledgement to Spain-le then said to me "I need to talk to you, let me wheel you over here." He wheeled me over to a quiet spot in a corner.

"What do you want with me?" I said still upset, "you better not try to rape me again, for fucks sake I still have innocence unlike seemingly everyone at our school."

France-ward flashed a look for a brief second that looked scary, almost disappointed but it was gone so fast it left me wondering if I had imagined it. "Oh you'll be safe with me mon cher, trust moi." France-ward said that grinning so sweetly I thought I had to have imagined the last scary look, and then he wheeled me to a deserted corridor.

"France-ward why are we over here? I thought right where we were was fine." I said curious.

"Hmm, why am I? Well I'm just gonna tell you one thing Iggy-la; you should be afraid of me," France-ward said getting closer, "I'm gonna tell you one thing and that's it is better that we're not friends, leave me alone and don't ever get in my way." With that he attempted to rape me, again this time managing to somehow get off my shirt even though he tied my arms down, but before he could get to my pants I kicked him in the face which got him to snap out of it.

"I'm sorry, that was rude of me and this is why you should stay away. I get urges sometimes that are nearly impossible to stop. Stay away Iggy-la, stay away." With that he ran off leaving me alone frozen in a mix of fear, anger, and for some reason extremely turned on.

The next month at school it went by without any event with France-ward. He did try to chat with me once with a "Bonjour mon ami how are you?" Which I promptly ignored, but he only gave up after a few days of that. Of course I did watch him from a distance; after all he was extremely beautiful.

No matter what I did to try not to, the nature of texts made my mum start to question my well being. But whenever he would ask about it I would just shrug it off and say it was fine.

_Brriinggg briiinnngggg_ the phone rang so I just yelled "GETTING IT," and went to talk to whoever was on the line. It was China-ca.

"Hey, Iggy-la I was wondering if I could ask Russia-ke to the Uke's Choice Dance, aru." He said nervously.

"Go for it China-ca, ask him. You'd be cute together." I said encouragingly.

"Really, aru? Thanks! I'll go ask him right now!" he said excitedly and hung up.

The next day was worse at lunch, China-ca and Russia-ke weren't sitting together and they were both not talking to each other. Even Korea-ic could sense the mood and was abnormally quiet.

"Hey, Iggy-la I was wondering if you were planning on asking me to the Uke's Choice Dance." Russia-ke said looking at me hopefully with his big violet eyes pleading.

"I'm sorry Russia-ke but I'm gonna be out of town that day, but I think you should go with China-ca you two would be so cute together." I said mildly creeped out, the guy was my friend but he was just so scary I could never go to a dance with him I'd be afraid he would murder me when we got home or something.

In biology France-ward and I finally spoke again he started with "Iggy-la I apologize for being so rude, but I do mean what I said even though I really like you."

Of course being the gentleman I was I didn't punch him I simply said with venom in my voice "Of course, I bet you tell that to all the people you try to rape." After that we didn't talk again during the class.

After the train wreck of biology I had cooking which was a class I failed on my best days. Which this certainly wasn't, my head was so filled with thoughts of France-ward (which got progressively dirtier. What was happening to me?) That I managed to burn scones. How could I burn scones? They're so simple to make!

When I was walking to my truck Korea-ic ran to catch up with me, his too long sleeves flying behind me as he ran. "Hey Iggy-la I was wondering if you would goto the Dance with me? I know that I am a seme, but the dance will be so awesome it had to have been invented in Korea so you should come!" He said jumping up and down excitedly at the last few words.

"I'm sorry Korea-ic, but I'm gonna be out of town that day, I'm going to Pittsburgh that day so I won't be able to go to the dance." I said making a place to be as quick as possible.

"Oh, well then see ya!" He said running off his one stubborn curl bouncing as he ran.

As I was pulling out of the school lot France-ward Mullen blocked my car with his as he pulled out of his spot. "Fucking frog," I said cursing the world as Estonia-er pulled up beside me. "Hey, I'm sorry France-ward's being a wanker and is pulling out right in front of me." I said

"Knowing him, he probably is taking a wank. But that's beside the point; I wanted to ask you if you were gonna ask me to the Uke's Choice Dance." He said making me raise an obvious question.

"But this is a Uke's Choice Dance, why are you asking me. Anyway, I'm gonna be out of town that day." I said snapping, instantly feeling bad as it wasn't his fault Russia-ke and Korea-ic pissed me off enough that day.

I drove off as soon as France-ward pulled away; I swear he had been smirking as he left. I was muttering to myself the whole drive back, making plans to curse the entire world. When I got home I attempted to make dinner for myself, but gave up and put in a microwave pizza and ate it when I got a phone call from China-ca.

"Hey Iggy-la guess what, aru! Russia-ke said yes! We're going to the dance together, aru!" China-ca said, I could practically feel him bouncing up and down. He and I talked about the dance for awhile and what type of tux he was gonna get (he wanted something with pandas) for awhile then he hung up and I read for the rest of the day.

The next morning on the way to my classes France-ward Mullen stopped me and asked me one thing "Next Saturday, I heard you were going to Pittsburgh, would you like a ride?" He looked so innocent and cute when he asked that it was hard for me to remember why I should never get in a car with him.

"B-but I thought you didn't want to be my friend! I thought you hated me!" I said quickly, saying the first thing on my mind.

"I never said that I didn't want to be your friend, oh I want to be that very much mon amour. But I said it was better that I not be your friend." He said looking at me, I felt like he was staring straight into my soul.

"Well, uh, umm well. YesIwillgowithyou," I said rushed, feeling like a teenage girl in love.

"Well then, I'll see you later, but it's really better if you be safe around me." He said and I made a mental note to carry condoms around with me, and lube.


	4. Chapters Five

** Basically right now I'm like gonna be typing out two chapters at a time as well I realy don't know, but it seems easier for me to do it that way so yeah... (this is chs 5 and 6 btw)**

** Hokuto Uchiha-Thanks xD, and I'm glad that it made your day :P**

** KireiHana1995-I really have no clue why Sealand's the father, like seriously it was just a moment where I was just like OKAY THIS IS GONNA BE IT...There's gonna be a lot of those moments as it gets longer heh...**

**Oh, feel free to suggest characters (I may or may not have them planned out already, but I'm not gonna announce who's gonna be who :P)**

**Oh, and if I have grammatical mistakes, just tell me, I'm not the best like grammar person ever, but I'm open to like help...If I overuse like (as I guess I tend to sometimes type the way I talk...Total. Poland.) just tell me, like seriously. Also hablo un poco español, and no hablo French so again, if I make mistakes tell me, but I'm gonna get some help from my friends who're fluent in Spanish and French...(One was born in France, the other's dad is from Columbia :P)**

**Okay onto the next two chapters...**

That day in lunch I was disappointed, all of France-ward's siblings were there, except for him. My eyes scanned the cafeteria searching for him, and I saw him. All alone. But when he caught my eye, he raised his eyebrow and motioned for me to join him.

"Er, I'll be um, right back. I think France-ward needs help with something." I said awkwardly getting my lunch and the slip of paper China-ca gave me about some party they were having at the beach.

"Do you need help with something, France-ward?" I asked.

"Nah, I was just wondering if you'd sit with me today." He said grinning.

"Is this some plot to rape me?" I asked, but secretly my heart was racing at the prospect of sitting with the hottest guy at school.

"No, this is not a plot for me to rape you, mon amour, if it were, you would be drugged and in my bed already. This is simply a plot for me to get you to become my friend, mon petit lapin." France-ward said, still giving me that easy grin of his.

"Well, uh okay then." I said awkwardly.

"By the way, I think your friends are going to murder me for this, the death glare they're giving me is very entertaining. I think they're jealous of me stealing you for today." France-ward laughed.

"They'll get over it. But France-ward you're sending me huge mixed signals." I said not understanding him at all.

"Oh will they? What if I decide never to give you back to them? And mixed signals? Non, it's just your English mind trying to understand what me, from the land of love is doing." France-ward said, his easy grin gone from his face, and his eyes serious.

"English mind trying to understand you? Bloody hell! I'm smarter than you'll ever be you, you WANKER!" I screamed.

"Oh calm down, Iggy-la. Now I got tired of not being around you, of you not talking to me. Please just stay with me for lunch." France-ward said, his face so breathtakingly beautiful my anger was forgotten for a minute.

"Fine, just please don't molest me. Again." I said, blushing.

"Molest you? Moi?" France-ward said laughing "But seriously Iggy-la, I would like to be your ami. Just give me a chance."

"Alright, I will be your friend. But I swear France-ward, stop trying to molest me." I said.

"But, mon amour you need to be safe around me. If you're smart you'll be safe." France-ward said.

"I know you think my English brain can't comprehend that, but I can France-ward. You don't have to keep reminding me!" I growled.

He patted me on the shoulder and grinned at me apologetically.

"Wait, as long as I'm safe around you, we can be friends?" I asked, shyly _how does he have this effect on me_?

"That sounds about right, mon petit ami!" France-ward exclaimed.

"But France-ward, there's something about you that I just can't put my finger on." I said.

"If you have theories, tell me them." France-ward grinned, reclining back on his chair.

"Well, there's one that's um...You're Canadian, I mean that would explain all the French, and the accent well you could have been French Canadian or something," I said.

"You're wrong Iggy-la, I'm not Canadian. By the way, your boyfriend seems to be getting upset over our 'fight', this may get very interesting very soon." France-ward smirked

"Wait, what? Boyfriend? I do NOT have a boyfriend!" I said indignantly.

"Haha, if you say so." France-ward said as the bell rang.

"I'll see you in biology?" I asked him.

"Nah, I'm skipping today, you're welcome to my car though." He said winking

In biology our teacher had an announcement that we were gonna be testing our blood type that day. I couldn't stand the sight of blood, it just made me weak, but I wasn't going to tell anyone that. After all being a gentleman I can't say what I can't do, but I have to go through with it to the best of my ability. But of course, when my teacher pricked his finger to show how we do it, I fell out of my chair my face as pale as a sheet.

"Iggy-la, are you okay. Iggy-la?" My teacher said worriedly.

"I-I'm fine, I think. I just d-don't like the sight of blood." I stammered.

"Well, then I'm gonna have to get someone to take you to the nurse. Russia-ke get over here and help him out." My teacher ordered.

"Da, I will help." Russia-ke said then slung me over his shoulder and ran me to the health centre.

"B-bloody hell get me off your shoulder you wanker!" I screamed at him.

"Nyet, you're sick and you're going to the nurse. You understand, da?" Russia-ke said and that was when I knew he wasn't going to let me leave. I could only hope that the psychopath didn't murder me.

"Russia-ke, let him down, I can take him from here." France-ward said getting out from his car.

"Fine, but if you lay a hand on him, I will murder you. He is one with Russia. Isn't that right Iggy-la?" Russia-ke stated.

"I'm NOT one with Russia, just leave me alone Russia-ke." I said running into the arms of France-ward, who in turn groped my arse. "Gah France-ward STOP THAT bloody hell."

"Why? You are the one who ran into my arms, mon petit lapin, I thought you would want this." France-ward smirked. "Just get into my car already, I'll drive you home. Unless you would like to stop by my place for some fun, after all I just know you'd love to."

"I do not want to stop by your house you wanker. I can also drive myself home bloody well!" I said my face bright red.

"I doubt you'd be able to drive yourself home Iggy-la. Trust me; I will not touch you unless you want me too in the drive back to your place. Or mine, your choice." France-ward swore.

"France-ward, I do NOT want to go to your house, I would just like to get home as soon as possible, without you trying to molest me." I spat, there was just something about him that made me want to be around him, yet pissed me off.

"Fine then Iggy-la, but I'll take you to the nurse first then. This could have easily been avoided if you came to my house. After all Spain-le _is_ a doctor." France-ward said.

When we came to the nurse's office she freaked out trying to get my ice, and to send France-ward back to class. But France-ward said that he was supposed to stay with me. So the nurse sighed and went to get my ice and told me to lie down until it passed, which it did quickly. But when I realized I had cooking next and told France-ward about it, he told me to lay down and look pale, and he'd take care of it.

"Ma'am I think I need to take Iggy-la home, he has cooking next and I don't think he'll be able to work with the stuff like this." France-ward said giving her a look that was one part seduction another listen to me or I'll murder you.

"Alright, you can take her home." The nurse said.

"Damnit France-ward, I can drive myself home!" I said again.

"Non, non I'll take you home mon petit ami!" France-ward sung.

As France-ward messed with the controls, I heard a song that was familiar to me come on. "Clair de lune?" I asked.

"Yeah, it's a great song by the French, I'm not surprised you know it!" France-ward said.

"Well, I don't really know any songs by French people, but I do know this one, it's one of my favourites." I said simply.

"Ah mon petit! It's one of my favourites too! We have so much in common!" France-ward grinnied

"We do NOT have so much in common, France-ward. I'm surprised I'm even hanging out with you, my mum always told me not to associate myself with perverts, which this whole school is full of." I ground out, trying to control my anger and not punch him.

"Ahahaha oh Iggy-la you're adorable when you're mad, you know that right?" He said squeezing my knee. He pulled up at my house, "Well then, I'll see you later Iggy-la!" He said then pulled out.


	5. Chapters Six and Seven

**Okay I'm sorry everyone, I said the last chapter was 5 and 6...I fruked up and I only did chapter 5 xD**

**But it was long enough you're not pissed...Right? :P**

**And yeah I'm doing 6 and 7 now...New characters time? I think so...**

**Ramen is Happiness-Lol thanks xD I really don't know how to say the names either but when discussing it with my friends I'll just say something like Russia-k like just a k sound xD then with Korea-ic I just say it like Korea-ic xD yeah I really don't know :P**

**AnatheAwesome-Thanks ^_^ I'm glad you like it**

**BTW I'd love to have your suggestions for characters. I already have some planned out like James and his posse...and some of the "wolves" (*cough* failwolves *cough*) planned out...But just suggest away ;D**

**Oh and sorry for like, not putting stuff out quick enough, I've been busy...I'm parterning with my buddy Audrey (she's Swanlight on Deviantart, I'm The-Smalls-Artist (you can get updates on Hetalialight on there too from me as well as art...) so if you want to follow us and get updates please do) as she has better grammar and spelling than me...So yeah _**

**ONTO MORE STUFF NAO **

Chapter Six

I sat in my room, trying to concentrate on The Fellowship of the Ring but actually straining to hear France-ward pull up with my truck so I could go out and see him again. This was really starting to turn into some sort of scary obsession, but when I looked outside for what had to have been the millionth time, my truck was suddenly there without a trace of sound, or, more importantly, France-ward.

I wasn't looking forward to school tomorrow: even though it was a Friday, China-ca was more than likely going be a bitch to me as we weren't really good friends. I had realized that I was just someone for him to use so he could become more popular with the guys.

Of course, I was (as I always am) right. When I sat next to him in English (or in his case, Engrish), he started being a bitch and making fun of me, making snide comments about my bedhead hair and infamous eyebrows, as I had predicted. However, at lunch when he was next to Russia-ke, he was much more pleasant. His attitude having done a complete one-eighty, he innocently asked me, "So what did France-ward Mullen want with you yesterday?"

"He didn't really want much from me," I said vaguely as redness began creeping into my cheeks. "Just some help on the biology homework, and he wanted to chat with me for a bit. Really strange chap though, he's very... intense about some things..." I trailed off, trying not to think of the multiple near-rapes. As fate would have it, I failed and blushed furiously.

The rest of the table fell into an awkward silence as we finished our lunches, and I tried not to focus on some unpleasant thoughts – like how France-ward wasn't there, and how turned on I was when he tried to rape me the other day. Anything but the latter. Luckily the lunch bell rang, but my good fortune shifted when I realized I was right behind Seychelles-ren as I stood up to go to class. I overheard her talking to Russia-ke.

"...I don't know why Eyebrows still hangs at our table. We all know he just wants to be with the Mullens and sucking France-ward's dick." She either didn't know that I was right behind her, or she didn't care. I wondered why she hated me so much; we had never exchanged more than two words. I did give her a dog collar for a present once, but at the time, I thought she liked it.

"Seychelles-ren, I happen to like Iggy-la," Russia-ke replied, and I didn't know whether to be happy or scared because he was defending me. "He will one day become one with Russia," he mumbled. He sounded like he thought I was his property; I opted for scared. I felt like I wanted to stay away from both of them, so I let China-ca and Japan-la pass me.

Sealand-ie seemed very excited about the fact that I was going to hang out with some friends that night as we went out to dinner, as according to several people I couldn't cook (in fact, my scones were very good, and so were my fish and chips). He seemed surprised I even had friends, but it was a new place, and here nobody knew that I had once cursed some guy from Hong Kong to have huge eyebrows because he had made fun of mine a couple years ago. He had also shot fireworks at my house. He deserved that curse.

Pushing that thought from my mind, I asked Sealand-ie, "Hey Dad, have you heard of a place called Useless Rocks? I think I heard some kids talk about camping there before."

"Well yeah, I've had to pull out some rape-murder bodies from there. I don't see why anyone would want to camp there though. Too many roses." Sealand-ie said.

"Hm, I must have gotten the name wrong, then," I said, wondering who murdered those people. Then my mind went straight to France-ward and why he would lie to me about camping there. After all, why would anyone want to camp in a place infested with roses?

The next day I was excited to go to El Lupe beach, though of course I wouldn't be swimming. There would be too much cold rain. I wasn't looking forward to this trip very much, but when we got there, there were a bunch of random shirtless guys running around. "Those are the people who live in the El Lupe reserve!" Korea-ic said, sounding too excited than anyone should ever have been that early in the morning.

The first person introduced himself as Denmark-ul. He seemed to be the leader of the group. He also had a few empty bottles of beer around where he was sitting. I had a feeling he was Danish; they were born with alcohol in their veins instead of blood. The rest of the group introduced themselves, but only one stood out to me. He said his name was America-b, who reminded me that he was some old friend of the family's son. America-b and I started to take a walk to catch up on old times. I had totally forgotten how annoying his voice was, how hyperactive he was, how obsessed he was with heroes, his hamburger addiction, and overall how he generally annoyed me.

"So America-b, I was hanging out with France-ward Mullen, but he said that you guys didn't like him. Is there a reason?" I asked.

"Well yeah, there was some old tribe rumor about how his family was vampires and how the tribe was full of werewolves. How stupid is that?" America-b laughed.

"Yeah... stupid... Who believes in vampires and werewolves anyway? Hah, it's almost like believing in ghosts! So not real..." I yammered, trying to cover up the fact that I believed in all of the above, not to mention the fact that there were fairies giggling right now, obsessing over America-b's gazillion pack.

When we walked back, I tried not to think of what America-b told me, and what Sealand-ie told me about the rape-murders in Useless Rocks. Something was up with the Mullens, and it was definitely something supernatural.

Chapter 7

That evening, I had a nightmare. America-b was telling me to run as far away as I could. France-ward Mullen was coming out of the forest, his teeth elongated, and I didn't understand why America-b was freaking out until he transformed into a wolf. France-ward smiled at me, showing all of his teeth. In his seductive accent, he asked me to come with him, to trust him, to let him into my heart and life. I woke up screaming. It was the worst nightmare I had in ages.

Knowing full well that I wasn't going to get to sleep again, I switched on my computer, dreading it, but I knew I had to. I searched many key words like French, Vampire, French Vampire, and finally Hetalia. I uncovered no results on the Hetalia one except for dozens of fanfictions (one strangely titled Hetalialight. It scarred me. That author must have had problems! Pairing an Englishman with a Frog, what was she thinking?). After my fruitless searches, I decided on two facts, but they couldn't be true. They just couldn't be – there was no way this was possible. I believed in vampires, but he couldn't be French. I stood up from my chair and walked silently down the stairs, into the hall, and out of the house in a daze. Driven like a lunatic, I ran out to the woods, but shit, I realized too late that it was the wrong place to go. The forest looked exactly the same as the one in my dream. Well, of course they did: all woods look the same, but that was beyond the point.

"Come on Iggy-la, there's no way in hell France-ward is French. It's just not possible," one of my fairies said, comforting me. "It's so obvious he's a vampire."

"I guess you're right," I conceded. "It was silly of me to believe that he was French. Vampires are way more common, and less dangerous," I said, laughing it off. So what if he was a horny vampire? That didn't make him French at all.

I took a walk through the woods after that, chatting with my fairies. It was nice, walking off the path. Nobody could see me, or see me talking to what they saw as thin air, but what I saw as full of fairies and unicorns. People were weird; it was so obvious the fairies were there. But there was always that feeling in the back of my head that just made me think that it was true that France-ward was French.

The next day at school I came early, early enough to see Russia-ke sitting in front of the school waiting for me. I muttered several curses to myself as he approached me. When he tried to start a conversation, I just ignored him, until he started to chant "kol kol kol kol kol kol." that is. At this, I gave a nervous laugh and ran for the safety of the inside of the school. Still he pursued me, demanding that I become one with Russia. I screamed at him to leave me alone and to open his eyes as China-ca obviously loved him.

When I saw China-ca next in English she looked like she was about to explode from happiness: apparently she, Seychelles-ren, and Japan-la were going shopping and apparently wanted me to go with them.

"Hey China-ca, I'm not sure if you knew this but I'm not going to the dance, so I don't need to go shopping," I pointed out.

"Oh but come on and go with us! It'll be fun!" China-ca exclaimed.

I pouted. "Fine, but don't blame me if you get punched," I said bitterly.

The rest of the day passed without France-ward Mullen. I knew I was a little depressed, but what made me even sadder was the fact that my whole life was starting to revolve around the male who I had talked to about five times. Then there was the possibility that he was French. It was quite obvious he was a vampire though (I mean, really. Whoever can't pick out vampires in a school is bloody retarded). I had noticed him sparkling once, I remembered. What type of pussy vampire sparkled? Apparently that one guy – Edward Cullen – from that damn book "Twilight" they forced us to read in class, but that was beside the point. Vampires didn't sparkle, and this observation only served to fuel my speculations about France-ward.

When I told Sealand-ie about going out shopping with my buddies he seemed excited. He said that I could go immediately, which in turn made me excited, even though I hated shopping. The next day I told my friends that I could go and after I dropped my piece of shit car at my house China-ca took me shopping. Did I mention how much I hated shopping?


	6. Chapter Eight

_**Hey guys, thanks for reading this and commenting xD it's only gonna be one chapter this week as I was typing this on my friend's computer at the library (this took me about two hours xD I'm a really slow writer, I was also distracted, I was chatting :P so thanks for reading and whatnot~**_

_**XxAbisthinexX: Thanks ^_^ I'm glad you like think it's good xD**_

_**leader of lights: I'm glad you liked those lines :P**_

_**Alright, onto chapter eight  
**_

Chapter Eight

While I was shopping, I had a tsundere rush. It's not that I hated Japan-la, or China-ca – well, China-ca I wasn't too sure on, but I did hate Seychelles-ren. I also hated shopping, though I think that was covered enough before. When I had started to have enough of shopping I just announced that I would be leaving to take a walk.

I had been walking for a while, getting hopelessly lost in the streets when I ran into a large group of men. They looked mean. And drunk.

"Hey little boy, you wanna come with us tonight? We won't leave you bored," the taller man cackled, his sandy blond hair sticking up in two places.

"Just come on, we won't hurt ye, too badly," said another one, a ginger one.

"Leave me the bloody hell alone, you wankers!" I screamed and ran off into an ally trying, to lose them and thinking that I should've brought some pepper spray with me.

"Run, run, run, as fast as you can. We'll catch you little English man." The first one said evilly.

Of course when I was running, I tripped and the men caught up with me. "Little boy, don't be afraid. We're not going to hurt you too badly. If you're nice and go with us quietly you'll enjoy this more than it will hurt. If you're not, we have whips." The ginger smirked.

Suddenly a car swerved in, blocking the men from getting to me. The door next to me opened and a voice with a French accent screamed, "GET YOUR HANDS AWAY FROM HIM! ONLY I CAN MOLEST HIM DAMNIT!"

"F-Francis?" I asked, shocked.

"Yes, now get your ass in here before they try to rape both of us. Not that I would be bottom of course, men like me only top but that's beside the point." Francis said, pulling me into the car. At that point, I remembered that he had mentioned only he could get in the car with me, the near rapes, and then the fact that you shouldn't get in the car with strangers, or strange men. At that time however, that seemed like a good idea to get in the car. As soon as I got in and slammed the door, Francis sped off, getting as far as possible away from the scene of the near rape.

"Iggy-la, where are your friends?" France-ward asked me. "I thought you were heading out shopping with some buddies."

"Yeah, but since I hate shopping I decided to take a walk. Of course I didn't know these blasted streets and got lost." I pouted, obviously unhappy with getting lost.

"Hmm, well I know! I'm going to take you out for dinner! You're so thin, you need to eat good food, you've probably been dying after living on British food." France-ward said, shuddering at the word British like it was the worst thing in the world.

"It's not that bad! Scones are the best thing in the world, but sure I'll go out to dinner. Only because I'm hungry, not because I like you or anything." I said, trying not to sound like I was in denial – because I wasn't, not at all.

"Of course you hate me. Just come on, we're going to a really good French restaurant!" France-ward exclaimed, both teasing me and sounding really excited to eat French food.

"D-damn it France-ward. I'm English! I hate everything that has to do with those bloody frogs! Why are you taking me to a French restaurant?" I said indignantly.

"Oh come on Iggy-la, I know you'll love it!" France-ward exclaimed "after all you do love me." He said mumbling so low that I could barely hear it, and when I asked he didn't tell me what he had said.

When we got to the restaurant our waitress was obviously flirting with France-ward, but he didn't seem to notice. He was staring at me, obviously wanting to get in my pants. "Get the foie gras, it's really good." France-ward told me, ordering himself a wine and some cheese (how he got the wine, I didn't know. After all, he was far from twenty one. It must have been like how I could get beer at bars even though I was only seventeen).

When the food got there, France-ward just sipped at his wine and nibbled at his cheese while I ate my food. It was good – not that I'd ever tell France-ward that. My pride would never allow for it. I did have to ask France-ward one question though.

"France-ward, how did you know I was here? I don't recall telling you where I was going," I said.

"Iggy-la, I can sense sexual energies. Though I can't sense yours, I could tell exactly where you were by the sexual tension in the room. I can also make people horny," France-ward said, then as if to make his point clearer, two people for some reason started making out.

"Of course you can, that's just great. I'm with a fucking person who can bloody make people horny, and I'm eating French food. This day can't get any bloody better." I said sarcasm, just dripping off of every word.

"It would get better if you came with me to my house tonight." France-ward said suggestively. "But in all honesty, I can't do anything to you. You're just too much of a prude. Oh, by the way, I'm not sure if you knew this already, but you can't hate all things French. I just know you love me and I'm French. I also happen to be a vampire. A very horny, French vampire."

With that it fell into an awkward silence, the waitress came and gave us our check, France-ward paid then we left to get in his car. "Damn it," I said "I totally forgot my jacket in China-ca's car."

"Here, take my jacket." France-ward told me. I accepted it, blushing furiously, but not because I liked him, I was just cold.

France-ward drove home fast, so fast I was surprised that the police didn't come after us, but it seemed like he had an internal cop-sensor and managed to stay away from all the cops. I tried to keep my eyes from his, but when I looked his way I noticed that his eyes weren't on the road, they were staring at me full of lust.

"I'm not giving you road-head if that's what you're thinking about." I said wishing I was out of the confines of his car where he could do anything to me, and I wouldn't be able to escape. I wasn't sure I would have wanted to escape.

"Why not?" France-ward pouted "Would you have sex with me then?"

"Bloody hell, no!" I screamed while France-ward laughed at the look on my face.

"Well fine, but we're at your house, so don't bother paying me back for it. I know I'll get you to pay it back in another way someday." France-ward said, dropping me off, then speeding off as soon as I left. One day I was going to murder that man.


	7. Chapter Nine

Oh god I'm sorry I haven't updated in like, months. I'm here to make up for it now, after all it's summer break...I really should be working on my webcomic but hell, I'm going to finish this. Stop cheering, really it's not needed ;D. Oh I messed up on chapter 8, it went into chapter 9 shit, so I'm just adding this stuff in. Forget the error. Well here we go. Onto Chapter 9 (this one is long)

"I just want to ask one more question!" I exclaimed to France-ward as he sped up, his speed far exceeding the speed limit on this quiet road. He wasn't paying any attention to the road more than likely, he was attempting to reach his hands into my pants as I asked him.

He sighed as I swatted his hand away. "Fine, you can ask one more question, Iggy-la. But seriously this is like, you're tenth question mon amour."

"How the bloody hell did you manage to find me, you frog?" I asked him, blushing from him calling me his love. I didn't like this damn frog, no fucking way!

He smirked, a smirk I didn't like whatsoever. I followed the feeling of a prude with extreme sexual tension." He looked away, chuckling as my face turned red like a tomato. I tried to think of an acceptable response, that wouldn't include slamming his face into the wheel and saying every curse word that came to my mind. I failed, horribly and decided to forget about it and remind him about an earlier question.

"You never answered one of my first bloody questions, you wine faced git." I stalled.

He looked at me, annoyed. "Which one of your many questions, Miss Prude?"

My manly eyebrows twitched at that statement. "The 'following the feeling of a prude with extreme sexual tension' thing. Can you feel any sexual feelings? How the fuck do you do it? Does the rest of your family do crazy shit like that, that nobody should do, nor even want to do?" I felt stupid for asking questions like that, but I was trying not to get myself killed by a madman, who was obviously out for sex.

"Uh-uh-uh, that's more than one question, mon petit ami! If you ask another, I'm going to force you to give me roadhead~." He said, smiling. I simply glared at him and waited for a response.

"Fine, I guess I won't get roadhead from Miss Prude over here. It's just me who feels those. I can't feel everyone in the world. Only within a certain distance. The more I know the person, the more I know where they are and their sexual urges. It's quite useful for when I want to watch some. How you say it, free porn. But no more than a few miles." He paused, letting that sink in on me. "It's like when you're in a dance hall with sweaty, turned on people. You just feel it."

"Most of the time I tend to ignore it, unless I feel the urge to, well, watch some. Or find people, like how I found you. Everyone has their own feeling. But as I was saying, it's hard to concentrate when feeling everyone's sexual urges." He frowned, "it's hard when you want to seem normal when you feel everyone's sexual urges. And let me tell you, our school is filled with horny mother fuckers."

"So you found me that way? Do you always feel what I, err, feel?" I asked.

"The curious thing is, no. You switch on and off for me, kind of like a fuzzy old TV. Half of the time when I do feel you, it's very fuzzy and unclear. So I guess that's a way I can find you." He said stroking his beard with a hand and grinning at me.

"Great, so I'm a broken old TV. Good for me." I sighed. At that time I looked at the dashboard.

"HOLY FUCKING SHIT DO YOU WANT TO BLOODY KILL US YOU HORNY BASTARD?" I screamed, our speed was over a hundred miles per hour.

"What's wrong with you, Iggy-la? Why are you freaking out?" He said, looking at me with those blue eyes I lo-hated, I hated them.

"You-you're going over a hundred miles per hour!" I said, still panicking but not shouting. I looked out the window in a panic, but I couldn't see anything it was so bloody dark outside.

"Relax, Miss Prude," he said rolling his eyes "we're not going to crash. I always drive like this. And half those times I'm getting roadhead. I have above average concentration skills." As I glared at him he slowed down to eighty miles per hour. "Happy, mon petit ami?"

"No that's still bloody fast, you frog. And stop calling me your little friend, especially in french. I. Dislike. You." I growled.

"This is fast? Hah, mon amour, you have no idea of fast. This is terribly slow for me." He said.

"Slow down more, don't hit that rabbit. Watch out for streetlights." I said glaring at him.

"Mon dieu, enough commentary on my driving skills. You're so annoying, mon amour." He growled at me. "You owe me one thing now. One that I'm sure you'll give me, seeing as you're so opposed to giving me roadhead, even though it's a wonderful thing. What's a theory you have now?"

I glanced sideways, this was one thing I didn't feel like talking about. Especially not now.

"I won't laugh, at least, not a lot." He said.

"I uh, was talking to an old family friend. America-b Black, and he well. He said your family was well, vampires, and you were. French. Please don't laugh." Or rape me, I added in my head.

He did none of those things, he just tightened his hands on the steering wheel.

"What did you do when you got home?" He whispered softly.

"Well, I went onto the internet and researched vampires."

"Did it convince you that I was a vampire and French, Iggy-la?" He said looking straight ahead.

"No, nothing fit at all, I even got a good laugh out of it. But..." I said.

"But what, Iggy-la?" France-ward asked.

"I decided it didn't matter." I whispered looking out the side window.

"Hah, it doesn't matter to you, an Englishman that I'm French? It doesn't matter that I'm a vampire? What kind of idiot are you?" He sounded angry, I wanted to get out of that car, quick.

"No, it doesn't matter to me. I, love you and I always will," I did not just bloody say that I loved that wine faced git! I did not love him!

"Bwahaha, you love me? So you're finally admitting your feelings, mon amour?" He laughed.

"I-I do not! I was just trying to make you feel better!" I stammered, my face bright red. "But I am curious."

"About what, Iggy-la?" He sighed.

"How old are you?"

"About seventeen."

"How long have you been that age? And French?"

"Since, well, the creation of France." he admitted, his lips pressed in a thin line.

"But, you're out during the day time!" I exclaimed. After all, I did know all about vampires, I knew everything there was to know about the occult.

"Well, duh. Haven't you ever read Twilight? That's all true about Vampires, I mean we don't sparkle, but sometimes I'll put on some glitter to attract men. That shit is like a gay magnet!" He said, happily.

"Well, do you, drink blood?" I gulped, coming to the important question.

"Hmmm, not human blood. I survive off the blood of roses. Hence why I love them so much, besides the fact that they're beautiful things that look wonderful on a bed when you're about to have a romani-" He stopped as I punched him in the face.

"Bloody pervert." I muttered.

"Well, mon amour. I'd love to continue this... Rousing... Conversation, however this is your home. I very much so doubt you want me in there right now, so I'll content myself to watching you while you sleep." He said, muttering the last part so I couldn't hear it.

"What did you say, frog? And stop speaking that bloody language. It burns my ears." I grumbled.

"Nothing~ Well, adieu mon amour! I'll see you at school!" He sang as I got out of the car.

I took off his jacket, I mean I am a gentleman after all, and gave it to him. Inhaling the sent of roses secretly.

"Keep the jacket, you'll need it. And maybe you'll jerk off to the sent of it or something tonight. Seriously, you need to stop being such a prude." He smirked at me.

"Fucking frog, I'm not going to touch myself, that's dirty." I blushed.

"Oh by the way, don't go in the woods. You won't like what's in there." He said, suddenly serious. This man, err vampire, was bipolar or something, he switched moods like every few seconds.

"Just go away you bloody bipolar frog." I growled at him.

He drove off, speeding as always. I swore I could hear him chuckling as he drove off. Why did he have to be French? Muttering to myself I walked inside.

"Iggy-la?" Sealand-ie asked from the living room, watching the boat channel more than likely.

"Yes father, it's me." I walked in, sighing. There was no other way to get to my steps. Surprise surprise, he was watching the boat channel.

"You're home early. Can you make me some food?" He said flipping channels.

"Seala- I mean father, I can't cook. And I'm not home early, it's like two in the morning. I'm going to bed." I sighed.

"Eh, whatever. Goodnight Iggy-la." He said turning back to the boat channel. He was a horrible father.

I went to my room and thought about tonight's events. But I knew three things. First, France-ward was a vampire, and French. Second, there was a part of him - and I don't know how dormant that part was - that wanted to have sex with me. And third, If he came near me to rape me and suck my blood, even if I was in love with him. I would murder him.


End file.
